In our latest book circle, we explored Brianna Wiest’s When You’re Ready, This Is How You Heal, a profoundly introspective guide to navigating the healing journey with self-compassion, resilience, and intention. Our discussion, led by one of our Sages - Leslie Appleton Young, was rich with personal revelations, shared wisdom, and the gentle reminder that healing is not a destination but an ongoing process.
Healing as a Personal Journey
One of the core themes we reflected on is that healing looks different for everyone. There is no universal roadmap, no singular approach that fits all. Wiest emphasizes that healing requires an active commitment to self-awareness, a willingness to face emotions, and the courage to redefine oneself on one’s own terms.
“Everybody is having the exact experience that they need to be having right now.” – Brianna Wiest
The Power of Self-Compassion
Healing demands grace... grace for our past selves, grace for our current struggles, and grace for the time it takes to move forward. We discussed how easy it is to be critical of ourselves and to judge our progress against unrealistic standards. The book reminds us to practice kindness towards ourselves, to view our struggles with patience rather than frustration.
“Being kind to yourself is often doing the thing you least want to do. It is very often prioritizing your future needs over your current wants.” – Brianna Wiest
Facing Emotions and Rewriting Our Narratives
We discussed the importance of acknowledging and processing emotions. We reflected on Wiest’s assertion that true healing happens when we stop suppressing our emotions and instead, allow ourselves to fully experience them. We also explored the power of rewriting our internal narratives—shifting from limiting beliefs to empowering truths.
“What if the journey is really asking you to love a flawed person, so you might be able to love your own flaws the same way?” – Brianna Wiest
“It’s about choosing not to give your mental attention and emotional energy to things that will not grow into experiences you want to be having. It’s about realizing that you can construct a new dream. It’s about releasing who you are, in the smallest ways, and realizing that sometimes, the most ordinary things are the most defining, the most saving, the most soothing, the most important, the most overlooked, and the most real.” – Brianna Wiest
The Infinite Versions of You
One of my favorite chapters in the book shared that there is no single, fixed version of who we are. We exist in countless forms - there is the person we were yesterday, the person we are today, and the person we are becoming. I joked that people I went to grade school still call me "Debbie"... a name I no longer respond to - lol. Every individual we encounter holds a unique perception of us, shaped by their own experiences and beliefs. Often, we feel stuck when we try to define ourselves based on how we assume others see us. Recognizing that our identity is fluid and ever-evolving allows us to embrace growth and transformation with greater ease.
“When we feel most stuck, it is often because we are trying to decipher who we really are by piecing together images we assume others have of us. What we don’t realize is that there is not just one, singular version of us that exists.” – Brianna Wiest
Letting Go to Move Forward
A profound takeaway from the book is the idea that growth often requires releasing old versions of ourselves. This resonated deeply as we acknowledged the bittersweet reality of outgrowing relationships, careers, or mindsets that no longer serve us.
“You start to let go the moment you realize that this is the impetus, this is the catalyst, this is the moment you will never find peace standing in the ruins of what you used to be. You can only move on if you start building something new.” – Brianna Wiest
Personal Mission Statements
One of the final chapters encourages us to write or freshen up our personal mission statement. This made my soul sing! Here is what I have so far:
I wake each day in a state of deep peace, grounded in the life I have intentionally created. My work is a soulful collaboration with visionary leaders, where our shared purpose and passion create meaningful impact. I consult with soulful brands and humans two or three days a week, offering my wisdom in expansive, aligned, and deeply fulfilling ways.
Abundance flows to me with ease. I have more money and resources than I need and steward them wisely - investing, saving, and circulating them with intention. I live beautifully and intentionally within my means, knowing that true wealth is found in freedom, balance, and peace of mind.
My relationships are a sanctuary. My marriage is rooted in love, mutual respect, and joy. My friendships and family connections are vibrant, reciprocal, and deeply nourishing. I give and receive love with an open heart.
I honor my body and mind as sacred vessels, tending to them daily with care, presence, and devotion. I confidently move through the world, knowing my presence, words, and work leave a lasting, positive impact.
I am deeply grateful for this life, the work I am blessed to do, and the ripples of change and inspiration I create simply by being who I am.
Did you write one? If you feel like sharing it in the comments below, I would love to read it!
A Collective Commitment to Growth
As we closed our discussion, we reflected on how we can integrate these lessons into our lives. Healing is not about perfection but about progress. It’s about learning to hold space for all the coexisting truths in our lives—the joy and the pain, the progress and the setbacks, the certainty and the unknown.
“You will blossom in the moments you are most convinced you are failing and falling behind.” – Brianna Wiest
Today reminded me that our book circle is more than a discussion. It is a sacred space for reflection, connection, and transformation. Thank you to everyone who shared their insights and experiences. Let’s continue to support each other on this journey, embracing healing as a lifelong practice of self-love, awareness, and intentional growth.
“Instead of gripping tightly to that which gives you a place, I hope you learn that growth is really just learning to love what you have while you have it, be where you are while you’re there, and not get too flustered at the fact that you’re still a work in progress.” – Brianna Wiest
Have you read When You’re Ready, This Is How You Heal?
What resonated most with you?
Drop your thoughts in the comments and let’s continue the conversation!
Now, what shall we read next?
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